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As we go through our daily lives, we are most of the time planning and working on things that are important to us.  The reasons we have for this are many and varied, but the common thread is that we want to have things work out the way that we are planning them.  What happens though we the unexpected strikes?  What do we say and more importantly what do we do going forward?  This has all happened to us from time to time, so my first bit of advice is to avoid the thought that you are being singled out.

Quite often we blame our planning, or we place the cause on dastardly outside forces.  It is easy to get down on yourself and this vicious circle can result in a spiraling downward taking your focus on what is truly important to you.  Let the shock of the unexpected absorb in, it is fruitless to fight it because it is here and real.  Once the acceptance has happened, this is the chance for true growth.  Discover new things about you, those around you, the situation.  Ask yourself what you truly want and write down goals to reach for.  Remember, this is for YOU, the most important one here.  No one else gets to dictate what you do and what your goals are.  Keep planning and be flexible to change plans when necessary.  The most important thing is to remember that the unexpected will strike again in the future, so don’t be so hard on yourself when it does.

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Have you ever watched a ski race and noticed as the racer is going by that the cheering fans are ringing cow bells.  When I travelled through areas of Alps, I noticed the large herds of cows being lead to pasture.  In Switzerland, the scenes of cows going to pasture reminded me of the wonderful cheese that is produced in that country.  This tradition of cheering racers on in this manner has its roots in Switzerland with its rich tradition of ski racing.

When I heard of the bells in the current Olympic games, it got me thinking of what we use to rally us in the race of life.  What are our cowbells in life?  When you get up in the morning, what motivates you to reach for loftier goals?  During your day when you need inspiration to push forward, what do you use?  Some people use music, others use imagery; whatever works for you use it to raise your performance to the next level.

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While on a recent summer, I happened to stop by this small cafe on Highway 395 in Eastern California.  As many of you are aware, I did spend some time in Eastern Sierra wilderness.  I have a video address from the backcountry here on the website.  The cafe reminded me of one my father would take me to on our long treks to the Eastern Sierra’s for summer backpacking.  When I think of the drive back then with less than perfect roads and my father as the only driver, I feel blessed one hundred times over because of the sacrifices that were made by him.  This brought me back to my roots in terms of remembering where we have come from.  I wanted to share this with you so that you will remember to come back to your roots every now and then.  Appreciate where you have been, and give thanks for where you are heading.  These are the best self help lessons anyone can ask for – the true experience of reminiscing.

The office of the President of the United States.  The Oval Office.  The mere mention of these places conjures up images of the great men who have occupied them.  As we celebrate the birthdays of two of our greatest presidents, Washington and Lincoln, we should also remember the tremendous courage it takes to run for this office let alone occupy it.  So many great men and women have run for this presitgious office.  Many equally great people have supported the nation in its early stages.  One such person that comes to mind is Benjamin Franklin.

For the 44 lucky men who have had the honor of serving the country by being president, it is good for us to remember how they sacrificed and kept their goals alive inside them whilst others said that they could not amount to much.  Often it is not the brightest students of higher education who go on to achieve greatness.  Ulysses S. Grant, the victorious General during the Civil War and later President of the United States was not among the top students at West Point when he graduate.  Grant believed in what he was doing and inspired others around him to reach deep within themselves and reach for higher goals.

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Quite often I am asked, hey Mike what is one thing that gives someone an advantage in their chosen field?  Being in the personal development field I have studied this one at length.  The one similarity I see with successful people is that they have very close relationships with those around them.  That does not mean that the relationships have to necessarily be family, but that does help a bit.  So what are your relationship values?

• Do you regularly seek out friends and family to get together face to face?
• When something good happens to you, do you share that with those close to you?
• Do you offer to be with a friend or loved one in their hour of need?
• Do you value a friend or family member as if they are a treasure?
• Do you look for ways to strengthen the bonds of friendship and family?

You may have noticed that the questions all implied action on your part.  In order to get the most out of our relationships we must value them like they are gifts from above.  In truth, they are the gift that keeps repaying itself over and over.  It is easy to let others take care of us, but that is only one dimension of a relationship.  It is far better to experience the joy of giving back and putting value in your relationships.  Go out today and strengthen one bond.

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Personal growth training starts with an appreciation of these gifts from above.  We get so caught up in achieving more, getting ahead, performing better.  What is the secret to this?  Having balance in life to appreciate the beauty around us is the best self improvement tip that can be gleaned from this.

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There are many ways to overcome worry.  I have found one of the most direct and simple ways by Dale Carnegie.  His simple approach is as follows

• Ask yourself, “what is the worst that can possibly happen”.
• Prepare to accept the worst.
• Try to improve on the worst.

Beating worry is not only good for your spiritual consciousness, it does so much for your overall general health and well-being.

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• Know that you are what your thoughts are, keep your higher being first and foremost in your life
• Give thanks each day for the simple act of arising from slumber and greeting another day
• Make your higher being your reason for your self improvement
• Embrace your suffering for that which does not kill you makes you stronger
• Let your higher being see who you truly are for you are perfect in His eyes

Practice these tips each day and bring your spiritual side each and every day.

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• Keep your portion size to the size of your fist.
• Eat small portions throughout the day to keep yourself from coming to a holiday feast and wanting to eat everything in sight.
• Keep your exercise regimen and remind yourself to properly replinish your body after hard workouts.
• Remind yourself that it is not the number on scale that counts, rather it is the percentage of fat to muscle that should be your self improvement benchmark.

Mainting control over your food intake is mindfulness eating and the key to any success.  Give yourself an advantage and have some good exercise foods on hand.  Enjoy the holiday foods also and most of all enjoy the family and friends at this time of year.

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Why do we put with this?  I have seen how hanging on and trying to change someone into our mold of what we think this person should be can be devastating.  Do we feel somehow personally obligated to be there for some other reason?

Continuing in such relationships which are truly poisonious is one the biggest barriers to personal growth I know of.  Perhaps the other person is indeed a good person, however, the relationship you have built over the years has become one which does not serve you well.  Most likely the relationship is just as bad for the other party as well.  Do yourself a favor and wish the other person well, but move on and work on developing those relationships which lead to self empowerment.

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